So maybe I shouldn’t say a telemarketer. It was the bank for an account I have and never use. I will call him a telemarketer though as he was a pain in the ass just like the rest of them. OK that may have been a bit mean to say. I do have sympathy for them. Hell when I was pregnant I was a market research agent AKA glorified telemarketer. I was one of those people who called you and said “Hi I just want to do a survey on your recent dealing with such and such a company”. But anyways I still hate dealing with them especially since I got enough bullshit to deal with in my life lately. This call actually happened a few days ago but I thought I would share it with you tonight since those I have told the story to get a good laugh from it.
B is bank dude, N is me. With that out of the way. Enjoy!
B – Hi, I am calling from “Bank” to see how happy you are with our services
N – Well I am not using your services. The only reason I still have an account with you guys is because I am too lazy to get off my ass and go to the branch to close the account.
B – Well even though you are not using our services now we would still like to have your input on how we can improve our services to help you and maybe have you bring your day to day banking over to us.
N – Ya that’s not going to happen and honestly I have much better things to do then have a conversation with you at this moment.
B – Well this won’t take much time at all ma’am (side note: I HATE being called ma’am)
N – Fine I will humor you. Ask away.
B – Well before we get started I need you to verify your account. Can you please verify the address we have on file for you.
N – No I will not do that. How about you tell me my address and I will tell you if it is right or not.
B – Ma’am we need you to tell us it so that we can verify it.
N – Nope not happening. How do I know you are really the bank and not some scammer trying to get my information.
B – Ma’am your address can be accessed by anyone just from looking in the phone book.
N – Well maybe I moved or maybe my number is unlisted. Sorry but I did not call you so I do not know that I am really talking to “Bank”. You called me so YOU tell me the information and I will tell you if it is right or not. Or maybe I won’t. Again you may be some scammer who got access to my information and is trying to verify it before you go into the bank to steal all my money.
B – Ma’am I can assure you I am calling from “Bank” and am not a scammer. I do however need you to tell us your address so that we may verify we are talking to Mrs. Last name.
N – Well I am sorry I did not call you and am not going to verify anything so we are wasting both your time and mine. Have a nice day.
CLICK! and I hung up before he could say anything else. He hasn’t called back yet. I wonder if they will.
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I remember this. It was, and remains, HILARIOUS!
But my favorite is still the “are you happy with your long distance service provider” call you received during a road trip.
Ah yes. That was a good one as well. I think I am going to keep these stories handy for when I need something to blog about.
hehehe! funny thing is i can picture your tone too during that conversation….and how many times did you roll your eyes?
LOL not any actually. I was too busy making faces while trying to control laughter as Tobei was barely holding it together listening to the call.
I like this story, not better than the census dude though…..ie, are you gonna come down and slap me if I dont answer your questions…….still laughing at that one!!
That story is being saved for another day.
Beautiful.
Yes I am. Thanks for noticing
“Remove me from your calling list.” I’m telling you, it’ll suspend your upcoming heart attack from stress by a few years
Although that can be trouble with banks, too… my husband had to call and answer all these questions proving he was who he was JUST to get them to stop calling! Ridiculous.
I’ve done that as well. I am also on that stupid national do not call list. Nothing works. So now I just mess with them for a few minutes when they insist on having some of my precious time.
Too funny… I’m sure you were the most interesting call of the day! Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!
Thanks for stopping by. Hope you decide to stay for a bit.
Hahaha I truly enjoys this! He didn’t know what came his way!
Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!
Thanks for stopping by. Hope you come back again sometime. More stories like this will appear in the blog as they happen. I also have a few more lined up to post about.
SO FUNNY! And sad. And annoying. But the way you related it – EXCELLENT! Aren’t they just annoying? You want feedback but then you want to hassle me? I’m not into that either.
They always get a hard time from me when they call. I got lots of stories I will be sharing on here about calls dealing with telemarketers or anyone calling my house that is a business for that matter.
Um yeah not happening. There is no way I’m telling anyone who calls ME any of my information. You’d think the script-writer would have thought of that. Jerks.
What scares me is the amount of people who would provide everything about them to someone calling THEM.
I do not give personal info over the phone-EVER
Anyway, the reason for my comment is to say Thank-you so much for coming to my #ubp10 and leaving a comment! Thank-you so much!!!
Jody
Stopping by from the Lady Bloggers Tea Party. loved your post. I’ve had many conversations like this on with telemarketers. I ran a class with the elderly trying to explain to them what behavior may or may not be scamming. You can never be too careful!
Thanks for stopping by. I also had a post awhile ago ranting about internet safety. Little things can be dangerous in the wrong hands.
hilarious! i have a neighbor who always asks whatever telemarketer (male or female) who calls “What are you wearing?” Gets rid of them EVERY TIME! lol
Thanks for stopping by Pajamas and Coffee!!
xo
OMG I need to try that at least once.
That totally happened to me a few weeks ago. Some guy called saying he was collecting on a hospital bill for my son. And I said “whaaat? for when?” and he was like “first I need to verify you are Mrs. (Me) by verifying your sons social security number” And we went back and forth just like you did for like 5 minutes until he said “how about you just verify the social security number?!?!” and I said “how about you fuck off!?!?!” and hung up. Asshats.
For real? Ya dude I am seriously going to give my son’s social security number just because you claim to be from some legit place. Here you go would you like all his other legal information as well so you can steal his identity?
I KNOW!!! Can you believe that!?!?!?! The number was blocked too. I don’t think for one second the guy was actually from the hospital.
And it was blocked? Seriously? Sounds like a total scam to me. Scary part is there are more people than we can count who would hand over that information.
SOOOO scary!
LOL That was a smart way to get out of that conversation- you’re totally right- they called you, no reason for you to verify.
.-= Shell´s last blog ..An Island Girl =-.
I know. At least it wasn’t as bad as the call Cass got that she talks about in the comments in this thread. That is even scarier the crap they expect you to tell them when they call you.
Very funny. I will have to try that sometime. I found your blog on SITS. What a great blog you have.
Thank you. Oh yes totally give them a hard time. It throws them right off their little speech and can be quite entertaining.
HAHA Love it! Way to go
My Favorite: is when my grandma answers the phone and its a duct cleaning service and she answers with sorry all my ducks fly away and hangs up…
The first time I was like they Ment air ducts!… but she knew that she just wanted to make them laugh and get them confuzzled
I wouldn’t have given the info either! You have to be SOOOOO careful these days!
I wish I was as smart as you about this…I was always the type that gave out the info (color me stupid- my husband always yells at me for it)
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